Should people still have to ‘come out’?

Should people still have to ‘come out’?
I recorded two podcasts recently with awesome chaps here in Edinburgh who I met via good old Instagram.  Funnily enough, we covered the subject of ‘coming out’ and then a week later I found it was ‘national coming out day’.   It got me thinking.  Do we need to come out?  Instead should we not come out of putting ourselves in boxes and holding onto labels.  This topic can be related to anything.  With it being World Mental Health Day yesterday, I have had a lot of inspirational and honest discussions this week with regards to normalising all discussions around our mind.  Your health, be it mental and physical or your sexuality SHOULD NOT be viewed as some kind of secret.

Podcast episode 69 has had an amazing response this week which has some top chat from Daniel (find his super cool page here).  I wanted to ask him a little more.
Edinburgh lifestyle - national coming out day
I love your style. What inspires you ? 
It sounds very basic but I’m very influenced by the seasons (which in Edinburgh can be quite difficult). It also depends how I’m feeling. Clothes are definitely a sure fire way to know what’s going on in my head.
How can we know when we have found our own true style?
It took me a while to find what I felt comfortable in and suited me. The best advice I have is to experiment, pick pieces that you might not usually wear or maybe something that you might not think you suit. You may be pleasantly surprised. Once you get a couple of pieces it definitely becomes easier. I chop and change all the time and try to mix and match what I already own.
Edinburgh lifestyle - national coming out day
It’s ‘coming out’ day this week – how long do you think it will be before the need to ‘come out’ is even a thing? It seems quite outdated.
We’ve come such a long way already but we still have a long way to go. I fully agree that it’s outdated and not necessary, but people are so obsessed with labels and when it comes to anyone from the LGBTQ+ community people feel the need to know the definitive labels of someone. If you aren’t ready to do so that’s ok, take some time process it yourself and when you feel comfortable start with telling someone you can really trust.
Fave hangouts in Edinburgh and why?
I’m a coffee fiend so I’m usually aimlessly wandering coffee spots, my favourite is fortitude on queen street. Small but the coffee is great. If you want to indulge, a friend of mine (Calum) told me to get an oat milk mocha and they’re to die for!! Also a hangover top top! Teuchters Landing at the shore do the best food ever for a hangover.
Fave quote or mantras to live by?
Here for a good time not a long time.
Dreams for the future?
I honestly can’t wait to start a family one day! However I still have the travel bug so one day I want to give myself more time to go explore the world.
Fave way to slow down and be present?
I’ve recently got in to meditation, I’m still getting the hang of it but what a difference I’ve found in myself and I’ve not been doing it for long.
Edinburgh lifestyle - national coming out day
 What a babe!
Podcast episode 70 (out this weekend) will be with the lovely Scott who runs Blu Blazer Guy (find his fab page here).
Edinburgh bloggers - coming out day 2019
I love your blu blazers. What inspires you?

So many things inspire me!! Travel, Nature, Music and people like you of course!

Which outfits make you feel joy?

I am so not good in clothes pics and in all truthfulness prefer to be naked than fully clothed!

(Haha me too – shall we start up another naturist blog and call it Adam and Eve?)

How can we know when we have found our own true style?

That’s a tricky one, as after 39 years I still haven’t found my own true style, except for a blazer of course. I really admire people that find a style that truly reflects their personality and soul, it almost looks like they were born to be in that particular style and they look so at ease. For me my blazers are kind of like a superhero outfit, the moment I put it on I feel ready to embrace the day and any challenges that come my way.

Edinburgh bloggers - coming out day 2019

You get to do a lot of exciting press trips. Do you have a fave place to travel to so far and why?

I am very blessed to have experienced an array of amazing opportunities and travel through my blog and through Guild Magazine. One of my most memorable trips which was not work-related was Morocco, which completely took me by surprise. Whilst visiting, we took a two-day trip through the Atlas Mountains to stay overnight in a camp in the Sahara desert. There were only four people in the camp and we sat around a fire, eating traditional food and speaking about each other’s lives.  It was completely dark and silent except for the wind that would whistle and howl as it hit the surrounding sand dunes. It was such a spiritual moment for me and made me realise how lucky and blessed I am in life.

It’s ‘coming out’ day this week – how long do you think it will be before the need to ‘come out’ is even a thing? It seems quite outdated.

I have come to the realisation that for some people they do not feel the need to ‘come out’ and it is a very natural process for them but for others, the act of ‘coming out’ can be very cathartic. Saying the words “I am gay” out loud can perhaps come across quite insignificant but it is actually a huge release for some people who have found it difficult to deal with their sexuality and have remained silent for too long. Coming out for me was not an easy process but I do feel it was something that I needed to do to move on with my life and to be the person that I was truly meant to be today.

How can we stop putting people in these silly boxes and let them be free?

I think it’s just human nature for people to put other people into different boxes who appear different to them. It’s up to the individual that has been pigeonholed, we can choose to be offended and respond negatively to it or we can rise above it and educate others.

Fave hangouts in Edinburgh and why?

Edinburgh has a fantastic range of places to hang out and I have been lucky enough to experience some of them through my blog. For a really chilled drink, I often love to visit The Registers Club located in the prestigious Edinburgh Grand. The ambience, the staff and the delicious selection of cocktails are just some of the reasons why I love to go. If I need some inspiration when typing up a blog post I often visit Nor Loft, the champagne bar located on the top floor of Market Street Hotel. It’s bright, airy and has amazing nooks and cranny’s to sit in whilst looking out to an amazing view of the city.

Fave quote or mantras to live by?

“Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, set up a life you don’t need to escape from”

Dreams for the future ? 

I have so many dreams! I have sometimes been told that my head is in the clouds or I am a daydreamer, but without dreams so many fantastic things in the world would have never happened. Following on from my favourite quote above my number one dream for the future would be to set up a life somewhere else in the world and continue to write about travel. I love Scotland and it will always be home but I always have an insatiable appetite to see as much as the planet as possible. I don’t fancy being on the go constantly but I hope to find somewhere in the future that truly resonates with me, preferably somewhere warm, colourful and full of inspiration 😉

Fave way to slow down and be present?

For me nature is the thing that helps me slow down and become present and luckily Scotland has this in abundance. Within a short distance we are surrounded by the most beautiful countryside and you will sometimes find me walking along the leafy Water of Leith or hiking through the Pentland Hills. A true escape for me is Perthshire as it has the perfect mix of forests, mountains, rivers and walkways, as soon as I have visited I feel recharged and ready to take on the world.

When do you feel most alive ?

I would say travel is the thing that makes me feel most alive. The new sights, sounds and tastes re-ignite my senses and fills me with so much energy and inspiration. Sometimes life at home can become hectic and overwhelming and for me travel allows me to escape that bubble and remind me what life is truly about and how blessed I truly am.

 

What a guy!
Thanks to Daniel and Scott for the inspiration.  Looking forward to drinking some champagne with you both soon in a swanky hotel.  Perks of the job but hey we work hard.  We need to stay hyrdrated X
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