Most of you will know my thoughts about perfect Mum by now. If not check out the article I wrote a while ago here. People loved it so much that a chapter in my book brings her back. What a pest she is, piss off ‘perfect’ Mum.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what type of Mum I am. You see, some days I just don’t feel like the type of Mum I imagined I would be.
In my head, before I had kids funnily enough, I was going to be ‘Mother Earth’. I would sit around playing shops, building towers and rolling down hills. Working life would be a distant memory. In fact, with the cost of childcare why would I ever want to work again? Why would I want to leave my kids when I could be with them all day long?
It didn’t happen. Does that mean I don’t utterly adore my kids? Of course not.
I will be flying to Greece soon for some sunshine, cocktails and meze YAMAS! I love a bit of meze. In fact, I’m just a ‘Meze Mum’. A Mum who freaking loves her kids so much but also freaking loves a bit of me time. In fact, when childcare arrives I have the car keys out quicker than Radio 1 with a new Ed Sheeran track.
I am a Mum who cries in a heartbeat when I watch the news, this morning being one of those times. A Mum who is often amazed by the little people my body created. A Mum who watches her kids sleep ‘stalker style’ and feels a mixture of relief for a bit peace and quiet yet a pang of overwhelming unconditional love.
I am an impatient Mum. A Mum who looses her rag. A Mum who questions herself. A Mum who craves a bit space. A Mum who enjoys her job. A Mum who gets so exhausted by constant requests and demands during the witching hour. A Mum who is desperately trying to find balance in a crazy world.
Like a meze, I am a blend of hot and cold dishes and that is fine. I’m hot and I’m cold but that’s normal. I am alive. Can you feel a song coming on? I feel two actually! Let’s blend – meze style. A fusion of the contemporary and classic beats. Pearl Jam takes on Katy Perry during one of my least favourite times of the day. The witching hour.
It doesn’t have to be all or nothing. I’m not just a warm Sunday roast with all the trimmings that my kids can snuggle up to on the sofa – LOVE being a roast by the way.
I am also a lamb vindaloo with extra chilli.
Some days I am a cool cucumber and others I am vanilla ice cream with toffee sauce. Some days I am a super bubbly champagne and others I am a flat coke. That is life my friend.
This morning I played shops for an hour – I was a Granny, a dude, a little girl, a Grandad and a dog. It was fun. The kids loved it. But then as soon as childcare arrived I did a Usain meets Mo. Because I love a bit of balance. That balance is my meze. What is yours?
Maybe you love time alone to clean the house, to go to the gym, to visit friends, to write, to read, to laze in front of trashy tv and forget about our crazy world for a bit. We all need a bit time. You are not just a parent or carer. You are a person. A person born to enjoy being alive. A person with unique thoughts and feelings. A person capable of doing incredible things whether you are a parent or not. You are one beautiful meze spread. You are alive and if you watched the news today, and every single day for that matter, we are lucky to be here.
Being a ‘Meze Mum’ is a beautiful thing. It is real life. It’s about finding a life balance that works for you. Because we can’t have it all. Some days we can’t be happy about anything, some days we laugh. Some days we work hard at things we care about and others we laze around. Some days we chose our PJ’s and others we chose our finest gear. Some days we have top chat, other days we have nothing to give. Some days we feel caring and kind, others we feel angry and frustrated.
Some days I want to jump on my husband and rip his clothes off – not great with little ‘passion killers’ in the house. What’s the story morning glory? I shall tell you. A tub of play doh or an ipad in the other room can only last so long. Is your sudden urge really worth all that time pressure? Some days my husband annoys me so much I can’t even look at him or stand to be near him, cough cough PMS PSYCHO.
Some days I eat kale and salmon and drink 3 litres of water, others I neck cocktails like they are going out of fashion and have a cheeseburger happy meal the next day. Note: the free toy makes me feel a bit less guilty about the hangover and lack of playing shop. It’s a cold meze Mum kinda day.
Some days I train like a beast, others I sit on my ass at my desk or on the sofa for hours on end. Some days I have energy, others I have none. Some days I feel confident, others I feel weak. Some days I love to cook and others I can’t see past a tin of baked beans. Some days I do my hair and wear makeup and feel like a sexy (ish) minx, others I feel like something the cat dragged in for dinner.
I am a ‘meze Mum’, daughter, wife, sister, auntie, cousin, friend, lover, companion and that is ok. Life is all about balance. The good, the bad, the beautiful, the very sad, the ugly and the magical. Who doesn’t love a bit of meze? Yamas !