Ah Mother’s Day: what a wonderful concept. The reality is – my 1 year old had no idea what day it was and my 3 year old (who told me on the days leading up to it that she wanted to get me a ‘walking stick’) was more interested in how much chocolate and cake she could eat. Luckily for me I knew there was more in store than a walking stick when my husband had a rant at me about a payment that came out our account. The look on his face was priceless when he quickly backtracked realising it was my gift HE had purchased #hilarious.
When Mother’s Day started to creep up on us I thought ‘amazing I might be able to bag a long lie on Sunday’. Who doesn’t love an extra hour in bed? I had a vision of everyone keeping quiet and creeping downstairs to let me dream on zzz snuggled under our amazing soft duvet. The reality was that my 3 year old put all the lights on to their brightest setting and started jumping up and down on me. Not even the ‘Bonnie, it’s Mothers day can you tickle my back and let me fall back asleep?’ would work.
I also had a blissful vision of being brought breakfast in bed. It would come on a tray filled with all my favourite things. I would get lots of cuddles and then I would be left to chill in bed with a coffee and a magazine. The reality was that my hubs really didn’t fancy the idea of getting crumbs in our bed. He did bring me a cup of tea with my card and gift,which was so much appreciated until my 1 year old tried to pour it all over me.
I ponder over the pressure that Mothers Day puts on the Dad’s. I could hear the poor soul downstairs trying to make breakfast with the kids running wild. He wasn’t feeling the greatest and I knew he was SO desperate to scream for me to come and help as he normally does. How could he do that on Mother’s Day though? Of course not! I was to lie in bed, pat myself of the back for being a great Mum and relax whilst drinking my cup of tea in peace. The reality was that it wasn’t very relaxing listening to the sound of a hungry 1 year old screaming, a 3 year old shouting orders and my husband trying to keep calm whist cooking the Stornoway black pudding (yum) to perfection.
After breakfast I thought it would be lovely to go for a nice walk. I had a vision of us walking hand in hand, chatting away and laughing. The reality was that after we FINALLY made it out the door our 3 year old was off at lightening speed on her scooter and our 1 year old started to run in the opposite direction, trying to pick up whatever he could find. We decided it would be best to ‘take a child each’ and spent most of the time running after them.
My vision of our lunch out was that of drinking fine wine at my leisure and eating some super tasty food. The reality was that my 1 year old was not amused at being put in his high chair and my 3 year old didn’t want to sit at the table, she wanted to explore. As a result she continued to promise that she ‘needed a wee really bad’ just to leave the table. We shoveled our food down at lightening pace and got out as soon as possible.
Both sets of Grandparents were due over later in the afternoon for tea and cake. My vision was of all of us sitting round the table, enjoying cake and having a lovely chat about Motherhood. The reality was that Bonnie dominated the chat by screaming ‘hello poo poo head’ and this got progressively louder the more cake she eat.
I had a vision of snuggling on the sofa with both kids late on in the afternoon before bath time. The reality was that they wanted to run around like mad and trash the house.
I had a vision that the kids would go to bed on time and let us chill on the sofa with a movie of my choice. The reality was that our 3 year old refused to go to bed and when she finally did, and we had the chance to clear up, it was too late to watch an entire film.
The reality is that planning the ‘perfect Mother’s Day’ with two small kids is impossible. The reality is that these little people surprise us all the time. The reality is that they need the looking after, they are too young to look after me.
What I didn’t visualise were the tears I would shed on seeing the card Bonnie and her teacher made for me at nursery.
Nor could I visualise the warm fuzzy feeling I would get when I heard our one year old laugh after we did ‘one, two, three weeeee’ and threw him in the air for the first time. I didn’t visualise how my heart would melt a little when Bonnie, once again, got super excited at the prospect of me telling her old stories about my childhood. I didn’t visualise just how adorable it would be to watch our 1 year old sit smiling and singing his heart out on our bed before his bath. I didn’t visualize how great it would feel for Bonnie to kiss me and tell me “I love you sweet Mummy Jojo”. I also didn’t visualise how thankful I would feel to be sitting round the table as a Mum of two healthy kids with my Mum and Mother in Law.
The reality is that the dreamy pictures we often imagine in our heads of the ‘perfect day’ are not always what make the day perfect. I may not have got everything I thought I wanted, but I now realise that the memories I have of the little things are what mean the most. That is not to say that I am not very excited about our kiddie free spa afternoon I was given for Mothers Day !!